A student from Ohio State University wants to know…..
I find myself attracted to my roommate's boyfriend and he makes passes at me when she's not around. If I follow my true feelings my friend will be hurt, but should I sacrifice my happiness for hers?
Female, First-Year
Dr. Caron's Response:
In terms of your friend/roommate being hurt, I think she is being hurt already. She's seeing a guy who isn't being honest with her. And you, as her friend, are not being honest. Someone needs to start talking. In this situation, it sounds like your roommate's "boyfriend" needs to have a serious discussion with her about how he's feeling. It isn't doing her any good to be led on. In addition, if you really feel strongly about developing a relationship with this guy, you'll need to talk with her about how you're feeling. It may be true that you will have to choose between your friend/roommate and this guy. I wouldn't be surprised if you loose a roommate over this. You need to decide what's more important in the long run.
